There are million other things I can be doing right now but I figured I would try to write a few things and get them out of mind so I can move on with my day.
I feel like I am in quite a battle right now. I am getting over a bad cold I caught the other day so I am phyically drained. I am working on some financial issues that are getting cleared up so I am mentally drained and I am still trying to get this new office started and bring in new business in the mist of all that is going on. Which God is blessing but it is not an easy task!
I came across this quote today in the "Enjoy the Silence" book. "Too many if us panic in the dark. We don't understand that it's a holy dark and the idea is to surrender to it and journey through to real light" p.56 That is me right now...I am panicing. I wish I could just say "amen, amen" and just move on. But I can't... I am overwhelmed with more thoughts, frustrations, depression, etc than I have EVER faced in my life. Why can't I just trust God and let go? Why am I panicing in the dark?
My family needs me to be strong right now and work through this to give them a great future. But I don't feel very strong right now...all I want to do is fall down and cry. This is honestly a new experience for me and I don't know how to handle it.
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